Otis Twelve and Diver Dan Doomey

We join our heroes in the Warehouse of Semi-Solitude...

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been placed in command of an army of Time Creatures!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been crawnogged and gleened!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had tumbled through a cerebral vortex!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were engaged in a battle to the death with Mordor Kane!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had fallen into a deep hole on the planet Symbolic-9!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had crashed on the musical planet Rialto!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were doing one thing or other and then something else happened and now they're where they are now!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been captured by the evil Evil people of the planet Evil!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been invited for tea by Glorf's parents!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had swung in too close to a black hole!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been munching Dead Martian Dog biscuits!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was shocked by the astounding news that Stupid Larry had contracted the dreaded disease Rabbithead and was not long for this world!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was shocked by the astounding news that Stupid Larry had contracted the dreaded disease Rabbithead and was not long for this world!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was exploring the outermost reaches of the galaxy!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was assigned to take a refresher course on coping with some of the unseen dangers of daring space adventures!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had landed on the planet Woo! Woo! which appeared to be completely uninhabited!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had landed on the miracle planet Ferragamo!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had subdued the rebellious Ice Cream People of Planet 31!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was at the mercy of his arch-enemy, that evil-doer, the sum total of all that is rotten — Droid Donahue!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was on his way to the only planet left because there was nowhere else to go!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was in the throes of a dilemma!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had received his Space Network ratings, and the news … was not good.

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was hosting an intergalactic telethon to raise money to combat the most dread disease in the universe!

Last time, you remember, Stupid Larry and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were assisting in breaking the siege of Earth!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had vanquished the evil goldfish of little Timmy's aquarium!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was ordered to taste all 156 flavors of Marthdip Callogg's delicious grip green clomes!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been captured in his sleep and placed in suspended animation by the evil Droid Donahue!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had bounced of the repellant force surrounding the Surrounded Galaxy!

Let's just wing it!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been captured by the Vacuum Cleaner creatures of the planet U-Sucker!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was exploring unknown parts of the universe!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was at the bottom of the perfect vacuum planet, Oma-hole!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was speeding through outer space in their spaceship, which they call The Spaceship, in search of fellow life forms in distress!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had inadvertently destroyed all but 8,000 of Saturn's 160,450 moons, including the one from which the universe is controlled!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was playing Pong by himself on the ship's computer!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had run out of space bucks!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack was engaged in battle with the amassed forces of evil!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been severely scolded by the husky ladies of the planet Cell-U-Lite!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack had been dragged kicking and screaming before the Galactic Drive-Thru Window and Supreme Court! The charge: malicious planetary destruction!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had miraculously escaped certain doom at the hands of the evil Boom-Boom Robots of La-Da-Da 9!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were spent on a dangerous secret mission by Daring Space Adventure Army of Earth headquarters! Of course, they never went on that mission.

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been invited to address a meeting of the Space Buddies Parents Association on the Planet Rama-Lama-Poo-Poo!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been captured by the Space Corsairs of Phaseland-2! Find a time warp!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been separated during the brutal corporate infighting on the planet Mffdut, or Marglfss. . .

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been ordered by the Daring Space Adventure Army of Earth to join the fleet of Space Admiral Punk, Space Admiral!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had narrowly escaped the forces of the evil Mr. Timothy Smith, insane master of the planet of Average People by painting their spaceship with invisible paint!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been summoned to the headquarters of the Daring Space Adventure Army of Earth. There, Space Commander Wack relived of his command and Stupid Larry was promoted to Space Commander!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were going to spy on the evil Bounce people of Tramp-O-Leen!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were hurtling through the cosmos in their spaceship called the Spaceship when they suddenly developed a small problem: "We're on fire, Stupid Larry!"

Last time, you remember, our heroes had gained magical telepathic powers, but did not know it, so it did them no good whatsoever!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were in search of the Planet of the Graveyard of Old Jokes!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were fixing a hole where the rain gets into their spaceship and now the Space Buddy Communicator is busted beyond repair!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had rushed to the rescue of the planet Pinto on the far side of the Ford galaxy!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were tumbling through hyperspace! (Are they here yet?)

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been shot down by the over-assertive insecure psychological warriors of the planet Oedipus-X!

Last time, you remember, our heroes were embarked on a quest to find the Holy Whale!

Last time, you remember, our heroes had been captured by the evil Polka Folk of the planet One-ah, Two-ah!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were in full battle array for a fight to the death against the force of evil!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were… uh… slack-a-wack… uh… amnesia rays…?

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were engaged in mortal combat with the sinister Laid-Back People of LA-7! Glorf has now been captured by the galactic demon Minden Morkey!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had arrived on the planet Scum-10, where Space Commander Wack had been invited to address the Scum Congress...

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been captured by the grotesque and cruel Fish People of the planet White-Red 36!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been ordered out on a dangerous reconnaissance patrol into the Fish Gravy Nebula, where a vast alien space armada was gathering…

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were triple-dating with the Bonanza Sisters…

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been removed from combat duty by the High Command of the Daring Space Adventures Army of Earth. They were now engaged in the ignominious positions of hall monitors...

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had been sealed in an ice cave on the planet Nerk-poo-la-la-bish-dingo-nips 6!

Last remember you time, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were zooming through hyper-space in a last-ditch effort to barp the reem of an imbivalent armadope!

Chapter 10: In Which Lance Attempts To Escape From Prison And Solve The Case Of The Girl With The Knife In Her Hair

Chapter 9: Beauty Is Only Skin

Chapter 8: The Next Voice You Hear Is The Girl With The Knife In Her Hair

Chapter 7: Standing On The Corner Watchin' All The Girls, Watchin' All The Girls, Watchin' All The Girls Go By ... With Knives In Their Hair

Chapter 6: Casablanca

Chapter 5: Give Me Your Tired, Your Poor, Your Huddled Masses ... Or I'll Blow Your Brains Out

Chapter 4: Gown Without Pity

Chapter 3: Prelude To Chapter 4

Chapter 2: Under The Boardwalk

Chapter 1: The Making of Michael Jackson's "Thriller"

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were on their way to the planet Dumb, birthplace of Stupid Larry, to investigate reports of inexplicable insidious spreading ignorance among the Dummies!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had vanquished the fearsome Toddler People of the planet Pla-Skool despite serious damage to their spaceship!

Space Commander Wack! Glorf rolled down the steps again!

Last time, you remember, the evil Garbillo People of the Planet Ill-Knob-Wham had captured Space Commander Wack and had turned him into a suburban outdoor chef!

Last time, you remember, the Ballpoint People of Grievous Larger were showering a rain of deadly skyscrapers on the Planet Earth! Nevertheless, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were in their spaceship speeding towards Grievous Larger...

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had vanquished the insidious vegetable army of Emperor Glors Nofoon, Idiot Ruler of the Outer Quadrant! What further space adventures await our daring trio?

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were investigating mysterious explosions on the uninhabited planet Fructose-7!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had landed on the beautiful resort planet Norkus Blemm, when suddenly...

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog had escaped the deadly gravitational pull of the Cuando Radiation Belt, but now they were being pursued through space by Sinister Spaceships from Space!

Last time, you remember, Space Commander Wack, Stupid Larry, and Glorf the Dead Martian Dog were streaking through space in search of the villainous Dr. Sleep!

Chapter 10: Buttons and Woes

Chapter 9: Goats, Goats, Everywhere And Not A Mind To Think

Chapter 8: Death of a Cossack Salesman

Chapter 7: Gorky Parking Place

The final chapter of an 8-part adventure - and the final episode of Lance Stallion! Chapter 8: Beyond the Blue Event Horizon!

Chapter 6: The Evil Empire

Chapter 10: In Which Tom Jones, A Foundling, Is Taken Into The Bosom Of His New Family…

Chapter 7: Blessed Are The Meek - Cuz They Don't Get Hurt Very Often

Chapter 9: See What The Dead Boys In The Back Room Will Have

Chapter 4: See the USA in Your Babblemcheebagnolet!

Chapter 8: Return of the Tourist

Chapter 6: The Man On The Street!

Chapter 7: Lance takes a break from his mission of death in Switzerland…

Chapter 6: Greater Selfishness Than This Has No Detective, or The Little Snot-Nosed Kid Pays His Dues

Chapter 5: The President's brain is missing, Part 3, Segment 2 continued!

Chapter 5: If this is Switzerland, there must be a funeral…

The Final Episode! Chapter 10: A Walk On The Tiled Side

Chapter 7: We Built This City…On Top Of Another One

Chapter 9: Everybody Wants To Rule A Machine Parts Empire

Chapter 4: Have a Happy Day

Chapter 8: Dancing With A Shark

Chapter 5: The Blockett Hits The Fan!